harmonious balance

Slow your rhythms down, efficiency is not about speed, it is about accuracy. 
Accuracy tends to fulfill a time-line faster than speed does. There is an old Native American proverb: a young boy asks his Grandmother 
how long it will take him to accomplish his task. 
”Well,” she answers, “it should take about a week if you set your mind to it, but if you really hurry it will take about two weeks.” 
Be un-cautious, but do not be unconscious. 
Small focused steps produce greater achievements because 
they advance and do not stumble. 
Small steps become the biggest steps of all because small steps add up. Big steps can become extremely small when they fall down, stumbles require recovery. Real-time and perceived time have a relationship. 
This relationship determines our relationship with progress. 
Our progress determines our hope, our hope determines our mood, our mood determines our perception, and our perception determines our sense of time. Never allow yourself to remain uncomfortable because the present time reminds you of the past. Turn the clock and be in the inspiration of now. 
Once you commit to the reason why something is to be done, the how shows up. Once you commit to the when something is to be done, the how shows up. Inspiration arrives with a commitment and a time-line, inspiration then fills to the brim with all the details of the how. Use this in your life to have the time of your life, use the time of your life to create the dreams of your life. Use the dreams of your life to create and attract relationships into your life. Use these relationships of your life to share the time of your life. This is the greatest efficiency and purpose of life.
                                                                            - author unknown

peace & God bless in two thousand & zen
tom j deters
tomjdeters.com
  

Good morning! I hope all those in your circle of love are healthy and happy.

I mentioned last week that people are literally looking down more and more this simply due to the ever-increasing use and need of our cell phones in our lives. Whether walking, on a bike, working out, eating with others or even while driving; we are connected to them.

I just recently started texting. I know how could I function without it? I was the last guy to get a beeper, a pager, a cell phone and yes, the last guy to finally text. I get the benefit; it’s just that I work out of my home a lot so email has always sufficed. I knew when I got my new phone I wanted texting but not the web. I am trying not to be connected twenty four/seven. Many people are. Many people love it. I am not judging. I am just not one of them. The ability to reach anyone, anytime, connect w/ your home computer, your tv, browse, shop, email, text, fb, twitter, take a photo or video and instantly share it with millions of people is amazing… and you never have to look a real person in the eye.

Over the years I have become less and less of a phone type person. Meaning I don’t like chatting on the phone for very long. When I have down time, I usually want to do anything but be on the phone. I have friends in my life that for years we may only speak once a year and that is our friendship. So, the people I do speak with for the sake of just chatting is very few. Now post texting, I am speaking even less. We are now and will forever be connected to everything at any time. There is a ton of positive in that. But with that level of connectivity, there clearly comes with it a certain disconnect, or detachment from people. Which has created the ability to say anything to anyone and not care because you are hitting a send button, not saying it face to face. A friend brought up Cleveland Cavalier’s owner Dan Gilbert and his 14-page email he sent Cav’s fans the day after Lebron’s decision. He went off on Lebron, and that email went around the world. My friend asked if he would have ever done or said any of that to Lebron’s face? That same disconnect, detachment, time and space that we have created by being so “connected all the time” has also created an ability to not have to be accountable for all that we have the ability to say. I have friends that have websites and some of the comments that are left are unbelievably mean and extremely undeserving. I had someone go to my website, went to my old photo site, went to videos and watched one. The comment he left was, & I quote, “I can’t believe you just f-ing wasted 4 minutes of my life!”

How did I do that to him? Again, he didn’t know me, didn’t matter, not a real person so it doesn’t matter, hit send and continue to be unhappy (I’m just assuming he was:)

Let us all remember that a personal, real connection is far better than a million followers. That is why we are blessed and why we always need to have that intimacy in our lives.

Enjoy someone today!

peace & God bless in two thousand & zen
-tjd


 

Sunday Morning - “Looking Down”

Good morning & happy Sunday. I hope this finds you healthy & happy.

Whether you are riding a motorcycle or a horse, there is a saying that “If you’re looking down, you’re going down.” Personally, I have done both. I have had a motorcycle accident and I fell off a horse for 2 years, twice a night, sixe days a week in Vegas. But I heard it while doing both, that if you get caught in a bad moment and look down, that is exactly where you will go.

If you take this a step further, for example, a metaphor for life: We must look ahead, move forward. Do not stop or look back. Obstacles are that which you see when you take your eyes off your goal. Having vision, seeing clearly the path ahead. You get the point.

I thought about all of this one day when I pulled next to a 4-door car at a stoplight. I happen to glance over and all four passengers were looking down at their phones; that familiar “head-tilt” @ a 45 degree angle and arms @ a 90 degree angle. I see people walking, driving and sitting with that same head tilt. But, I see it more and more. Which made me think about progress and its negative affects on people. If we are stuck in our phones lives instead of looking around at the life that surrounds us, where are we truly headed? I get the amazing innovative steps that technology has and will always provide us with, but when everyone has that same look, head tilt, we are all consumed by whatever we are doing with our phone and not looking around, not looking at other people, not speaking, isn’t life passing us by? If we are not looking up, if we are not looking ahead at where we are going, aren’t we just following blindly following then?

Remember to have real conversation, with a real person and make sure to be in the moment, not in between tasks on your phone. Then simply remember to keep your head up, shoulders back, walking proud, screaming loud, looking good and feeling good doing the best you can with what you have! :-)

- tjd

 

Sunday Morning message

Happy Sunday & Happy 4th!

There are always things that challenge us, get us down or simply make us tired. Sometimes all we can do is “Fake it till we make it!” But that truly works. Do your best to place happy, healthy, positive thoughts in your mind, patience, kindness and love in your heart, and then simply share that with those that are around you today. 

“If you have some work to do, start this very hour,
You supply the willingness, God supplies the power.”
                                      - unknown

Be safe, have fun, smile, stay healthy & happy 4th

 - tjd

Sunday Morning - “A moment in the light”

Good morning & happy Sunday morning to you. I hope all those in your circle of love are healthy and happy today.

There are many times when I am caught in a mental battle, chaos between my ears, with repeated unanswerable questions looming. And yet with consistent effort, faith, God close, there are those magical moments that surprise you or make you look at something that has been there for a while in a different light and you know you are blessed. I want to be in a place where I can recognize those moments as quickly as I can, enjoy them for as long as I can and try to truly stay in those moments of clarity.

A moment in that light: I was aware that I am able to do what I like which enables me to accomplish what I need to while allowing me to pursue that, which I truly love. A good thing and no matter what I don’t have or what I might not get, that is something that no one can take away from me. But it is up to me to recognize it, embrace it & deem it important, simply because it I am worth it.

May you deem yourself worthy and may you realize when you are in a magical moment along your path…

- tjd

Sunday Morning - “Our Father”

I am happy to report that I was unable to get a message out last weekend, due to the fact that I was celebrating my nine-year anniversary with my wife in Big Sur – my favorite place. I stated before that I am focusing on the journey or at least trying to. If I can’t get my to-do list done, I am working on being okay with that, sounds easy, but a test for me. So when vacationing or hanging with family, I try not to let my to-do list sneak into my head. Sometimes I do this well & sometimes not so much.

This past weekend I was not sure what to write about being father’s day. So I put it off & enjoyed the day with my wife, more of the journey & not until today did I think about what to write.  I was talking with my wife and I mentioned my challenge to her, not knowing what to write. She knew it was a tough day for me for a few reasons & then she said this, “We should celebrate father’s day with God in mind. He is our Father who has loved us & helped us through our lonely, tough, scared, bad, fear-filled moments. It really hit me. What a great perspective! I am all about the perspective & if you can mentally manually turn it in a way that makes you feel better – TOUCHDOWN! To celebrate a union of 9 years with my best friend & have her still affect me, teach me & show me a better way to be & look at life is a true blessing. And my Father in heaven brought her to me J

Hope you had a great weekend & have an even better week!

- tjd

Sunday Morning - “Yes God, I get the message!”

You always hear the usual stories of pennies on the sidewalk being good luck, gifts from angels, etc.  This is the first time I’ve ever heard this twist on the story.  Gives you something to think about.

Several years ago a friend of mine, and her husband, were invited to spend the weekend at the home of her husband’s employer. My friend, Arlene, was nervous about the weekend.  The boss was very wealthy, with a fine home on the waterway, and cars costing more than her house. The first day and evening went well, and Arlene was delighted to have this rare glimpse into how the very wealthy live.  Her husband’s employer was quite generous as a host, and took them to the finest restaurants.  Arlene knew she would never have the opportunity to indulge in this kind of extravagance again, so was enjoying herself immensely.

As the three of them were about to enter an exclusive restaurant one evening, the boss was walking slightly ahead of Arlene and her husband. He stopped suddenly, looking down on the pavement for a long, silent moment. Arlene wondered if she was supposed to pass him.  There was nothing on the ground except a single darkened penny that someone had dropped, and a few cigarette butts.   Still silent, the man reached down and picked up the penny. He held it up and smiled, then put it in his pocket as if he had found a great treasure. How absurd!  What need did this man have for a single penny?  Why would he even take the time to stop and pick it up?

Throughout dinner, the entire scene nagged at her.  Finally, she could stand it no longer.  She casually mentioned that her daughter once had a coin collection, and asked if the penny he had found had been of some value. A smile crept across the man’s face as he reached into his pocket for the penny and held it out for her to see. She had seen many pennies before! What was the point of this? “Look at it” he said.  “Read what it says.” She read the words, ” United States of America”. 
”No, not that.  Read further.” “One cent?” “No, keep reading.” “In God we trust?” “Yes!” “And?”

“And if I trust in God, the name of God is holy, even on a coin.  Whenever I find a coin, I see that inscription.  It is written on every single United States coin, but we never seem to notice it! God drops a message right in front of me telling me to trust Him.  Who am I to pass it by?  When I see a coin, I pray.  I stop to see if my trust IS in God at that moment.  I pick the coin up as a response to God; that I do trust in Him.  For a short time, at least, I cherish it as if it were gold.  I think it is God’s way of starting a conversation with me.  Lucky for me, God is patient and pennies are plentiful!” When I was out shopping today, I found a penny on the sidewalk. I stopped and picked it up, and realized that I had been worrying and fretting in my mind about things I cannot change.  I read the words, “In God We Trust,” and had to laugh. ”Yes, God, I get the message!”

Sunday Morning - “Identify your cross”

I hope this finds you & yours having a safe & blessed Memorial Day weekend.  :-)

A guy I knew moved to another country to be with his girl & get married. There was good & bad, exciting & challenging times. Moral to the story is he got married in another country to his best friend, not much bad in that. A year later he still couldn’t find steady work, he was still struggling adapting to his 3rd language on a daily basis, living in a very small place & being newly married grew on him, their marriage, stress & health. A year & half after moving there they moved to the states. They wanted simple. They wanted peace. But they needed money to do that, security, & good jobs.

Within 6 months of moving back to his rural hometown where family helped them both get comfortable, one thing he was truly missing, him & his wife got jobs, rented a house, got 2 cars, a dog & a cat. The security & money they wanted. Life was good. A year later they were doing the same thing & starting to question what they had done. They worked a lot & didn’t get much time to spend together. Plus, all of the stuff from his past that he moved away from was still there. Both their jobs were unrewarding & demanding. They enjoyed the little time together with their animals doing simple things, while speaking of & missing Europe. They could live anywhere & do anything they thought. They decided that they were bored & young & that they would move back to Europe, get jobs & travel. They were both focused on the task at hand & how the family would look upon this bold move. They had found strength in each other & through their choices learned to know what they truly wanted & needed to be happy. They ended up moving back, not far from where they had lived just 2 years earlier. They got a great home to rent, shipped a lot of their stuff, animals & furniture with them & within 6 months they were settled on jobs, routines & enjoying being past the last few years of their lives. He was making more money & working fewer hours than he had ever before in his life. They had seemed to reach a new level. They wanted simple, & knew how to find it. They got what they asked for, along with peace & where & how they wanted to live.

A year later his wife was transferred to another location & missed her co-workers. He was promoted rapidly due to his vast experience in the work force & the need in which this company had. But with that came responsibility, stress & the discovery that his boss is the half empty guy, half the time & he never knows which. The test is becoming insurmountable. He was overwhelmed & seeking answers.

I shared this…

There will always be something; a test, your cross, a challenge or test. Call it what you may. You will have one. We will all have one, some more, embrace yours, it is yours. I probably know someone who has a cross that you would not want to trade with. Trust me. The key is to identify it as quickly as you can. Once you do that test will be over. Then you can do your best to enjoy that which you have & live a great life. Or you can fight the cross He chose for you. Scream why it shouldn’t be yours, not now. Put all your energy into that, life is about choices, go ahead. You will not get very far though, except for drained mentally, emotionally & spiritually. If that is what your goal is, then… congrats..?

If not then identify your cross, your test. Embrace it. Do your best & if you fail, completely have faith & the belief it wasn’t meant to be & that you will grow from it, learn a lesson from it or avoid a worse scenario, one that you could not have foreseen nor predicted. Thank Him for each day you have above ground. Pray He does not give you someone else’s cross to carry & humbly embrace & carry yours.

- tjd

Sunday Morning - “When will it be okay?”

When will it be okay?

When will it be okay to go outside and play?

When will the scary things go away?

Is there a worry free life, can anyone say?

When will the test begin, when will it end?

When will the lesson be learned, when will I transcend?

I’ve given all I can and I have no more to give.

I just want to be happy and choose the life I live.

The fear, the clouds, the rain on a rainy day,

All make me sad and the not knowing which way…

I am suppose to go, the path I am to follow.

There is no road in sight just the place where I wallow.

I just want to feel good, feel joy, feel peace.

For the cross to be lifted, for the pain to cease.

I pray my best is good enough on any given day,

And if it is not, that I can let it go anyway…

- tjd

Sunday Morning Message - “A Strong Woman vs A Woman of Strength”

A strong woman works out every day to keep her body in shape…

A woman of strength looks deep inside to keep her soul in shape. 

A strong woman isn’t afraid of anything…

A woman of strength shows courage in the midst of her fear. 

A strong woman won’t let anyone get the best of her…

A woman of strength gives the best of her to everyone.

A strong woman makes mistakes & avoids the same in the future…

A woman of strength realizes life’s mistakes can also be blessings & capitalizes on them.

A strong woman walks sure footedly…

A woman of strength knows when to ask for help.

A strong woman wears the look of confidence on her face…

A woman of strength wears grace.

A strong woman has faith that she is strong enough for the journey…

A woman of strength has faith that it is in the journey that she will become strong.   - author unknown

Happy Mother’s Day to all the Moms & surround your Mom with LOVE today! ;-D

- tjd